M5 - Learner Manual

Establish the Ground Rules

The mediator explains the rules and process involved in mediation.

First, meet with each participant separately, to outline what they can expect from you and from the process. Make sure that they are both willing to participate – mediation won't work if you try to impose it!

Agree on some ground rules for the next stage of the process. These might include asking each person to come prepared with some solutions or ideas, listening with an open mind, and avoiding interruptions. It's important that you build trust with both participants, and make them feel safe enough to talk openly and truthfully with you and with one another.

Sourced on 28/7/22: https://www.mindtools.com/pages/article/mediation.htm

 

Statements by the parties

Each party has the opportunity to describe the dispute.

 

Identification of the dispute

The mediator will ask the parties questions in order to gain a better understanding of the conflict.

 

Private caucuses

The mediator will conduct private meetings with the parties to obtain a better understanding of each party's side and to assess possible solutions.

Find a quiet room in a neutral location where you won't be disturbed, away from the rest of the team.

Meeting with the participants individually will allow them to share their side of the story with you openly and honestly. Use active listening skills and open questions to get to the root of the problem. Reflect upon and paraphrase what your team members tell you, to show that you understand their points of view.

Use your emotional intelligence to identify the underlying cause of the conflict, and pay attention to each participant's body language to help you to get a better sense of their state of mind.

Be prepared to encounter a range of strong feelings, from fear and distress to anger, and even a wish for revenge. But avoid shutting these feelings down – this might be the first time that your team members have fully expressed the impact of the conflict, and it will likely give you valuable clues to its cause.

Then ask each person what they hope to gain from the mediation. Remind them that it's not about winning, but about finding a practical resolution that suits everyone who's involved.

Sourced on 28/7/22: https://www.mindtools.com/pages/article/mediation.htm

 

Negotiation

The mediator will help the parties reach an agreeable solution.

Once both sides have had time to reflect, arrange a joint meeting. Open the session on a positive note, by thanking them for being open to resolving the conflict. Remind them of the ground rules, summarize the situation, and then set out the main areas of agreement and disagreement.

Explore every issue in turn, and encourage the participants to express how they feel to one another. Make sure that they have equal time to talk, and that they can express themselves fully and without interruption. If they become defensive or aggressive, look for ways to bring the conversation back to the main problem at hand. Encourage them to empathize with one another, and to improve their understanding of one another's point of view by asking questions themselves.

Once both sides have given their views, shift their attention from the past to the future.

Go over the points that were raised in your meetings, and try to identify areas where they have at least some shared opinions. Resolve these issues first, as a “quick win” will help to build positive momentum, and bolster both sides' confidence that a workable solution can be found.

Ask participants to brainstorm solutions and encourage win-win negotiation to make sure that they reach a solution that they're happy with. If a suggestion is unreasonable, ask the initiator what he would consider to be reasonable, and whether he thinks that the other party would agree.

Sourced on 28/7/22: https://www.mindtools.com/pages/article/mediation.htm